I’m going to preface this post by declaring loud and with conviction: I do not want Ciara and Russel Wilson to make a sex tape. I would not care to view said sex tape if it were to come to fruition. It is my fondest wish that Ciara and Russel resist the urge (if they feel the urge) to put out a sex tape.
Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s break this down, shall we?
So Ciara and Russel Williams tied the knot last week and they looked gorgeous.
We love it. I love it. Everybody loves it. In fact, like most, I’ve been in #teamCiciandRuru for every second of their very public relationship. I don’t even know if they are really happy (I mean I hope they are), but y’all know how it is in hollywood. Folks can be declaring their love one week, and announcing their breakup the next. Literally.
So the reality of their relationship doesn’t interest me half as much as the pleasure I can glean from imagining Future’s rage every time these two grace the red carpet. I’m chuckling right now just thinking about. Yes, guys, I am just as much on #teampetty as I am on #teamCiciandRuru. But you know what team I’m not on?#teamtewmuch.
Yes, folks, these two decided to gush about finally having sex (since they had announced last that they’d be abstaining until the wedding.)
Here’s how it went down on Cici’s snapchat:
Ciara says: “So, baby, you know what we’re doing tonight?”
Russell responds: “From what we did last night, I’m gonna do it multiple times.”
Here’s the thing: We’re to blame for this. We have paid entirely too much attention to these two over the last year. So much attention, in fact, that they honestly believed we’d be interested in the details of what went down in their martial bed.
Mind you, these are two attractive people. I mean, I love that they are enjoying themselves. Do it all day every day. But please, for the love of baby Jesus in a manger, shut up about it. And if they really can’t shut up about it, just go ahead and put out a sex tape. Or maybe they are vying for a reality tv show? Who knows, but all the publicity around their sex life is tew much. TEW MUCH!
See the snapchats in question here:
What do you think? Team too much, or am I just an old married lady who can’t understand all this extraness? Sound off below.